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Resurrection

Thinking about this easters happenings. I really feel they changed my life though I was already resting on the palm of God, so to say. I'm still feeling an incredible closeness of Jesus and... well its early to say. I'm trusting in the Lord to give me the strength to hold on to him. I'm already finding it way easier to resist some temptations.

I wrote the blog entries of the weekend by hand, and later Jenni read them out loud so I could write them on the computer. So thank you, Jenni.

Artists I saw during the weekend, and liked muchly:

• Matti Aspvik- Petri Matara
• .kraka
• Jim Mills
• Mikko Goes to Heaven
• Petri Matara
• Dance group Three babes of God
• Mimic Marianne Raatikainen

I'm going to drag Juha and Jenni there next year, too. =) No questions asked. Maybe Soile would like it too... umh =P.

Sun 2002-03-31 21:01 in diary No comments #link

A blessed easter for y'all

NP: Savonlinna Praise band

Yesterday was a day of much more sorrow than today. I guess that's good, since it was Good Friday (English for pitkäperjantai - why on earth is it called good?). I expected worse of today, but I was given peace. Peace with God, peace with Jesus. It's never too easy, though. I know there's no way I could turn back anymore, but still I doubt and wonder "what if...". If I turned God down... I know he would be sad. So I'm not going to. I've been taught so much today and during the past few days. There's been great Joy and jumping around, there have been strobo lights and a musical about the happenings of Easter some couple of thousand years ago.

I can just tell you what was presented to us but I cannot well enough describe what went on inside of me. Great doubt and luckily, even greater security - a bit later. I got to feel the closeness of God intensely... I got more strength to keep living with Jesus, I realized even better the power of prayer especially when it comes to temptations.

Jim Mills is great! A Pentacostal speaker/preacher from USA, who nowadays lives in Belgium. He knew talking, he knew singing. Oh well yeah, our Lord did.

Sat 2002-03-30 17:37 in diary No comments #link

Eeli, Eeli - the Silent Action -conference

NP: Mikko goes to heaven - Ally McBeal (live version)

Actually, I'm in the concert right now. So this song couldn't be more live. During the last one and a half days I've heard many speeches about Easter, faith and Jesus, basically. I've made a few new friends and seen "masses" of people. The names which I still remember: Samuel, Touko, Hankku, Jouni, Kimmo (well I didn't actually remember this, but asked Kaisa... It's the thought that counts, right? =). I've thought about Jesus and had many moments of despair... I've decided to sort of learn to pray more and to do it more full-heartedly... I don't know. Once I'm through university I'll probably use at least a year or two to study the Bible and my relationship with Christ. This happening has actually been organized by a "sub-church" of the Finnish Lutheran church - "kansanlähetys" in Finnish (translates roughly to "the mission of the people") I've been mostly to Pentacostal youth nights, so this certainly is a new kind of experience for me. The music that's played seems "technically" (couldn't think of a better word) more sophisticated (than the one of Pentacostals), and here are many kinds of bands. But that's not it. The only way (that's nearly acceptable) that I could think of to describe the differences is that the people and their faith seem more pale amongst Pentacostals. Here, the priests seem to want to show they are different than the rest of the people by using clothes meant for priests. There are more ceremonies, as well.

April the first: Found out that "kansanlähetys" is Finnish Lutheran Mission in English.

Fri 2002-03-29 21:09 in diary No comments #link

He will survive

It's easter. I'm travelling to Ryttylä (near Riihimäki) for the weekend. I'm going to do some thinking about our Lord.

The pic of the day

Thu 2002-03-28 10:36 in diary 2 comments #link

Revolution, sorta

I was bored with the dictatorship of Freebok on Finnish websites so I signed up for a sparklit guestbook, which seems sympathetic. Don't know whether I'm ever going to reaaallly use it, though. If I will, I would need to customize it, and I'm lazy.

Guestbook

Mon 2002-03-25 12:57 in diary No comments #link

Say again what you just said

Actually, I spent the whole weekend thinking about where to go with this life, but came into no conclusion, except for I'm going where Jesus is taking me.

Sun 2002-03-24 21:18 in diary No comments #link

A massive amount of nothing

Haven't been blogging in a while. My net connection to outside Finland (according to a few of my tests it was Finland vs. the rest of the world) has been broken today until now. I made the final exercise for my Java course. Chatted with Pehmo until like 4 am last night. Ate soy sausages; not delicious, but not bad either.

Sun 2002-03-24 17:07 in diary No comments #link

Happy

Met someone quite lovely today.

Fri 2002-03-22 18:13 in diary 2 comments #link

Attention giveaway

pyRads :: web advertising that doesn't suck

When I got my Blogger Pro, I got 8000 PyRads impressions for free. I really don't feel like wasting them on this site, so if you know some site that you think would deserve people's attention (8000 impressions really isn't that much, though), please write your suggestions in the commenting system (click the comments[n] link below). Or, if you really don't feel like making it public just yet, you may also contact me by email.

Fri 2002-03-22 11:19 in diary 5 comments #link

Honesty

Yesterday I visited an elementary school. For kids ages seven (or 6) to 13. It was late afternoon, so the house was empty except for a special teacher who met me in the hallway a while after I had entered. I had actually searched for that school because I wanted to know where will my Boogie Woogie lessons be next month. But now that I was there, I had decided to take a look inside the building. That special teacher told me it was okay to look around. I sure did. After I'd been to two classrooms (in addition to the hallways), the latter of which being one for sixth-graders, the special teacher showed up at the door of that latter classroom: "what are you doing here" - and he sounded really worried and angry. So I wasn't supposed to enter any classrooms. Well, the doors were open, and he didn't actually say anything before I'd been there already. Of course I had been surprised he let me in an empty school in the first place, but... It's totally understandable though, all the kids' belongings being in the classes, but... FINE. I have no excuses. I'm a total criminal. I didn't actually *do* anything else, though.

Mostly because of that incident, and because my exam yesterday didn't go too well, I was blue for the rest of the day. Before I went to sleep, I updated the site to look like it does now (btw, check out the frontpage at the root of the site if you didn't already). Sometime then I somehow realized that I had, in a way, been lying in my relationship with God. I mean; my faith usually isn't very rich of strong experiences such as talking in tongues or suddenly falling on the floor like Soile - so I've somehow been pretending something, I think. The previous slogan on my site frontpage - "Life is my game. Jesus is my Lord." or the one before that - "Getting high on Jesus only" ... they both seemed to be exaggerations somehow.

Don't get me wrong, though. I love Christ and my faith, I think, has never been stronger than it is nowadays, but it is kind of a quiet faith. It's a peace God has given to me at times. It's these moment's you just know something from way above has touched you, teached you, made you keep walking when you just didn't have the strength anymore. Soile thought it was because I hadn't been filled with Holy Spirit (Pyhä Henki) yet.

Fri 2002-03-22 10:16 in diary No comments #link

Examining you

Trying to find out how many people actually read this. If you are reading this (which is considered a considerable probability), please click the button below. It isn't supposed to say anything special, just redirects back to my journal page. Don't click it again. (The US government will know if you did - and I will, too ;-)

Just click the button. Once, please.

Wed 2002-03-20 23:01 in diary No comments #link

Just another day - of chaos

Yesterday he talked with a friend, and they agreed that he doesn't have enough time to be a friend of that friend. He decided to make his life a bit less of a chaos, in order to be a better friend to his friends (how confusing). He studied XML and translated the Blogger app Bloggar into Finnish. Hopefully it's useful to someone. He was on a couple of lectures which were of not much use. He resisted a temptation. He listened more to the old songs of Ismo Alanko (it's Spring). He continued some library loans in the Internet (almost wrote intervet and almost laughed) and reserved a book. He stared at the picture of inna_ for a couple of minutes.

The song of the day - in Finnish...

Tue 2002-03-19 18:58 in diary No comments #link

God bless her, a friend who now belongs to the past

He learned a lot tonight.
He thought he would grow wiser.
He would make it.

Tue 2002-03-19 00:05 in diary No comments #link

Olen täynnä traumoja kun sielutonna harhailla järkikullan jättömailla saan

ismoalanko-kunrakkausonrikki.txt
Ismo Alanko - Kun rakkaus on rikki

The poet he thought he was a couple of years ago would probably describe his current state like something what Ismo Alanko says in a song of his. Sorry to the ones who don't understand Finnish. During the few past years he has stopped writing poetry. Lost his innocence or his way of seeing things more humanely. Or maybe you'd like to call this the process of becoming a grown-up. He wrote an analogy to explain why did that happen, probably just to soothe his guilty mind. Guilty why? Because, as it turns out, he has ruined a friendship that once was very dear to him.

The analogy: one or two years ago he wrote lots of poetry. They say a poet cannot live without pain. Or if he can live, indeed he can not create - without something called (by me) the weight of life on one's shoulders. Perhaps his weight, then, was the fact that he was a shy, a sort of an antisocial boy, that his contacts to the opposite sex had been created through means like small penpal ads on youth magazines. No I don't know how frustrated he really was in his small life of perfection, but anyway he was capable of creating texts which he still is a bit proud of. But of course he wanted to be something he was not. He did not really stop writing, he just somehow grew out of it. Grew to be a more social being. A less sensitive being. A being who is less afraid. a person who, perhaps, loves less.

Many of his friendships seem awfully shallow these days.

Naturally all this is born to be a naïve and hugely exaggerated explanation of a boy who just simply is never satisfied with the perfect life he's got. There was more to say, but it was forgotten.

And why isn't God in any way described as a part of this story?

Mon 2002-03-18 21:29 in diary No comments #link

Movie rating: Astérix & Obélix: Mission Cléopâtre

I don't know how much of a movie rating will this be. Anyway, I saw the movie (which, according to my count, was the first sequel to the original Astérix & Obélix movie, published a few years back) and actually liked it quite much. Didn't really understand all the references to the American entertainment culture, though - since this was a French movie and usually, in general, the French would like to prevent English from becoming more predominant - this one just made fun of the phenomenon... It really was a lot of fun and in many aspects this one was better than the first part. The soundtrack had many good pieces, for example I Feel Good from James Brown.

Recommended.

Sun 2002-03-17 12:31 in diary No comments #link

Ironic intentions

np: Alanis Morissette: Ironic

Chatting with Soile on icq and feeling peaceful. Just finished the links -page of this site (see front page "new stuff" -list). I have a new philosophy about writing blogs... I intend to focus my texts more and more precisely. Write less words and more meanings. Shut up more and listen more. Learn more.

And eventually, be humbler and humbler. More anxious to serve God in the way He has meant me to.

Soile's telling me about her youth. I like to listen.

Sun 2002-03-17 02:11 in diary No comments #link

At Kiasma, like I know anything about genetic biology

So I've arrived at Helsinki. The first thing I did was I went to this coffee shop formerly known as Panorama, nowadays as Java. Asked the waitress what does 'doppie' mean and found out that it's a double espresso. I don't like coffee (except for cappuccino when it tastes more like hot chocolate than coffee - available in a coffee automat near you ... or probably not). In any case, I decided to buy a doppie since I didn't feel like wasting any more of my or the waitress' time. It tasted okay, though it tasted double as bitter as espresso does. I bet that was the point, it being 'a double espresso. I got a small chocolate button with it so the taste shock was smaller.

I probably couldn't be talking about anything less meaningful. The other day we had a discussion on #pulloilu on whether "ehh..." has only negative meanings or also positive meanings. I and Kaisa seemed to be the only ones thinking that in the context I had said it, it was sort of a positive comment on what someone else had said. Maybe.

The pentacostal night of the youth should begin in 32 minutes... I guess I'm not in a hurry. Maybe I should walk there? Well, anyway - enjoy life as it goes and - GOD BLESS YOU ALL! (I almost said God bless America but then, that wouldn't just be right, would it.)

Oh, I almost forgot to mention that this is my favourite place to blog. Like you didn't know that already.

Fri 2002-03-15 18:36 in diary No comments #link

Plans for today

Going to a Pentacostal meeting tonight, in my "home church"/Saalem at Hakaniemi, Helsinki. Love the thought. Now I ought to get myself moving.

Fri 2002-03-15 13:17 in diary No comments #link

What on earth *is that* you're drinking??

My new favourite drink (in addition to milk): freshly squeezed lemon juice with an effervescent tablet and some water to make the tablet dissolve properly/completely. Nothing wakes you up better!

Thu 2002-03-14 23:12 in diary No comments #link

Even if you're a Jew!

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo,
He loves me, I love You,
Therefore vicariously he loves you too,
Even if you're a Jew!

Did a test at selectsmart.com.
The religions suitable for me, according to this test, are:

1. Orthodox Judaism (100%)
2. Islam (97%)
3. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (92%)

"The highest score, 100, represents the closest match to your responses. This does not mean that this or any religion has every view that you selected. However, the religion at the top of your list shares more of your selected beliefs than the others."

The third one is closest to the beliefs I actually have, thinks me after reading the explanation.

So I'm a Jew. ;-)

Wed 2002-03-13 16:20 in diary 3 comments #link

Dic-dic-dictionary!

Pretending to study

enactment: asetus (noun), hyväksyminen (noun), laki (noun), säädös (noun), säätäminen (noun)
exert: käyttää (verb), pinnistellä (verb), pinnistää (verb), ponnistaa (verb)
akin: sukua (adje)
intertwine: kietoa yhteen (verb), kietoutua (verb), nivoutua (verb), punoa (verb)

I wasn't perfectly aware of these before.

Tue 2002-03-12 23:01 in diary No comments #link

Hey it's dinnertime! Ehh...

I'm eating conserved can ravioli in tomato sauce. It sure feels like student life. I'm too busy right now to be doing this.

Tue 2002-03-12 19:52 in diary No comments #link

Statistics of pilpi

Did a "dir /s".
This site consists of approximately (file extensions):

• 351 .php
  
• 14 .htm, 2 .html
  
• 279 .jpg
  
• 174 .gif
  
• 6 .css
  
• 909 .*

15 537 484 bytes. There are probably some others, as well.

Tue 2002-03-12 19:22 in diary No comments #link

Morning

Woke up. Had a long chat with Soile about Jesus yesterday. Her words gave me hope. I should eat breakfast.

Tue 2002-03-12 10:04 in diary No comments #link

a poem in Finnish

jos saan kaiken tämän, olenko onnellinen?
kyllä sitä iän myötä kerääntyy
rahalla saa ja junalla pääsee
ostamaan vihreän puuhevosen, jolla auringonlaskuun ratsastan
punaiseen

blogThis! Pro lacks title field.

Mon 2002-03-11 17:40 in diary No comments #link

Messed up in a happy way

Listening to The Crash and trying to study. Katri is half-asleep, waiting for me to finish so we can get to town and see if there's anything to see. Last night I called Jenni and she told me she has nothing to do with any satanists - yesterday some people (someone) that called themselves (himself) Satan wrote to my guestbook and claimed that Jenni was one of them...

Feeling pretty happy and quite hopeful about my summer job - for no reason whatsoever.

Sat 2002-03-09 10:12 in diary No comments #link

Pentagon and an Animation

http://www.asile.org/citoyens/numero13/pentagone/erreurs_en.htm
http://www.dreamwiz.com/

Ehh, funny.
Don't care (I didn't) if you don't understand anything on the latter page. At least on IE 6 it shows an almost-amazingly nice advertisement.

Wed 2002-03-06 22:20 in links No comments #link

[no title]

I overdid myself.. or something, today. After trying to seek for a job for something like a week I visited a recruiting services office today. After they had taken copies of my papers and a photo of me I left and felt good about the fact that at least something was successful in my search of a job (Finnish people: see the previous message to understand properly what I mean). After that I suddenly felt an incredible courage to just walk into company office buildings and ask whether they might employ me for the summer. I was pretty sure I wouldn't have the courage to do such but I did. I visited a local newspaper Tamperelainen, a travel agency and a couple of computer shops.

I had also found a cheap hairdresser/barber nearby where I live. So I looked pretty decent before visiting those companies.

Thank you Jesus for this semi-peace.

Wed 2002-03-06 16:34 in diary No comments #link

[no title]

I'm looking for a job. I seriously am looking for a job. Please tell me if you want to hire me. Because, it's no use if you want to hire me and you don't tell me. So TELL ME!

Seems perfectly logical, doesn't it?

Mon 2002-03-04 12:45 in diary 10 comments #link

[no title]

Suddendly It's been a hard day's night (and I've been working like a dog - which ain't true) starts playing in my mind, though what was playing in the taxi when we left it a couple of minutes ago was Fastball's The way ... or something.

At first I miswrote what it says up there: like a god. I didn't notice it until a couple of paragraphs later. I wonder if that means something?

I've spent the past few days with Jenni, we've watched a movie and made food. Last night my "roommate" Monsu had a private party of some kind, five people were involved. One of them passed out not much later than I met her. It was nice, people were nice. I got a permission to loan Monsu's digital camera some time.

Today, as well as yesterday I was supposed to write out a job application and update my cv and find more places to send the application to. A new friend of mine said that he's probably going to seek for a job in some construction site. Actually I might do that - I wouldn't need to stress about the job much while working, I wouldn't have to spend so much time writing an application - knowing French doesn't help much doing that sort of work. I've worked in a construction site two times before, so I guess that would be considered as a merit. I would also probably make much more money than in the kind of computer job I have a chance of getting.

Jenni and I had decided that today (Saturday) we would go to a karaoke bar somewhere in Tampere because her friend was the one who organized the karaoke in the bar. There were supposed to before of Jenni's friends too and someone she'd met in the internet. After six o'clock in the evening we had already met Juha and off we went. Later in the evening we also met Hanna and Mikko.

We visited another friend, Niksu, who came with us as well before going to the bar. The bar was a totally new kind of an experience to me. It was in the middle of nowhere in a town called Ylöjärvi (where I've actually lived the three first years of my life). It was a skanky local pub with an average age of fourty to fifty. I mostly talked with a male friend of Jenni's (and played a couple of games of billiard or pool or whatever), since we seemed to had a lot to talk about. At some time of the evening I started taking photos of people and of him, as well. He wanted a copy of a photo I had taken so I gave him my email address. He said 'pilpi' sounded familiar, and it turns out that just when I had begun ircing and found a regular channel, he had been a member of that channel for a longer time. That's a huge coincidence because the channel we're talking about consists of about twenty people at a time. I never got to know him in irc, though, since he had stopped using irc before we had had the chance to chat much.

I sang "Päivänsäde ja menninkäinen" with Jenni in karaoke (I was BAD). When we came back to Jenni's appartment some of us decided to use the stairs instead of the elevator. We saw that in someone's door it read 'Kamrat' in the door and we thought it was funny.

Sun 2002-03-03 02:44 in diary No comments #link

[no title]

"Loot at these pants, they're no good"
"I can see Willy!"
"Haha, free Willy!"
"I think Willy's had his share of freedom already"

Saw Blade runner. It was a good one but I'm quite lousy at following movies. I often don't understand how the plot goes... so I didn't understand the plot too well.
To kiss someone that is you and then kill him, to kill your god.

Fri 2002-03-01 23:41 in poetry No comments #link