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Hiding from myself

Days just go by.

Made food for the both of us, it was tasteless. I forgot some things.

Washed the dishes.

Was supposed to go to Elina's place tonight but now that we still haven't gotten ourselves moving, I guess I won't.

Got lots of books to read here and lots of other things to do - such as answering people's e-mails - but most of it just makes me feel anxious.

And I'm all out of cola, too.

Mon 2003-06-30 16:18 in diary No comments #link

Citing myself

At about three in the morning last night:

- - - no näitähän riittää, maailmassa. ihmisiä,
epätoivoisesti pärjäämässä: hei, me lennetään!
kiivetään ylöspäin hei katso, siellä se jo näkyy!
mielettömyyden huippu vailla minkäänlaista
epäilyksen pilviharsoa
näköpiirissä

Sat 2003-06-28 16:43 in runot No comments #link

Wasting my time

Playing around. EOW

Also, published "the wriggling bird" -photo at aukea

Sat 2003-06-28 16:01 in diary No comments #link

Suffocation @home

Anxious. Just watched Mulholland Drive and it didn't help a bit. Lost in this life. Wishing I could enjoy it, right now I don't know what that means. Borrowed a bunch of books from the library. It's hot here, and dark.

Fri 2003-06-27 20:41 in diary No comments #link

Windy warmth

Feeling calm. Visited Bemmu and the usual feeling of fear generated by trying to escape idleness faded, for a while. We played some Dance Dance Revolution (the video game which gives you directions on how to dance on a special mattress), went swimming in Suolijärvi and drank some cappucino and cola.

Thu 2003-06-26 23:28 in diary 1 comment #link

Servant

Just finished washing the common oven of this two-man flat. Before that, I translated another version of w.bloggar to Finnish.

Fine, so I haven't blogged in more than a week. I was at Nurmes, where Elina's parents live. We also visited the Pentacostal summer conference at Keuruu. The five last photos of the landscape gallery I published today are from that trip.

No, I guess I didn't really have anything to say.

Wed 2003-06-25 20:02 in diary No comments #link

Bowling for Columbine

Just finished the movie 'Bowling for Columbine'. Feeling sad about the world, and just helpless to do anything. Michael Moore has a way of showing things, well, seemingly honestly, but after making me so sceptical about the US (about the people with power), something about the overall solidness of the movie made me sceptical. Probably for no reason, though.

It's just these nights, after being shown what the world really is like. Feeling worried now, but after a night well slept I will have forgotten all of it and live on, to become a better computer scientist. Sure, a computer scientist can do good things to the world, but I'm (again...) considering starting to study something to actually understand the world around me better. Too bad I'm awfully cynical about being capable of doing this, as well. When did this happen?

To return to my casual reality: Yesterday, I finished retouching my mom's old photos. After that, I sent those photos to Ifi's great service: they provide a software I can send my image files to them with, and they send paper photos to me (or in this case, to my mother) by mail. View sample

I also published a gallery of some of, in my opinion, the best photos I've taken this year. Customizing the album software to look like the rest of pilpi.net is still underway.

My mother's father died on Friday, at the age of 86. I don't feel much sorrow, since I didn't really know him that well, but that might come later. The funeral is after a couple of weeks.

The last few days I've also concentrated on setting up my linux box (the server is not nearly always online, since I sleep in the same room with it).. Getting there. But why? Learning, I guess...

Also on Friday, I had a job interview, by phone, for an intern position in the EFC, in Belgium. I wasn't chosen, but I was one of the three people each of whom they would have wanted to choose, as the interviewer told me.

On Tuesday morning, at six in the morning, Elina and I are going to take a train to Nurmes, where Elina's parents live. On Friday or Saturday we're probably going to the largest religious happening in Finland in the summer, the pentacostal midsummer conference.

Mon 2003-06-16 01:50 in diary No comments #link

twenty-five cents gets you a good square meal

The sun is rising. It's a beautiful sunrise too. I took some photos, but am too tired to upload them.

An hour or two ago I finished the book Hacker Etchis (Hakkerietiikka) by Pekka Himanen, a Finnish philosopher. I had sort of an obsession to finish it tonight.. also, it's library due date was today (in my date system that's Wednesday since I haven't slept yet).

After finishing the book I put Blur's record Parklife into my old-and-clumsy CD-player, and took off with my roller skates. After a minute or two the book was returned, I'm hoping not to get any penalties for returning the book after the library closed (there's a box to use if the library's closed).

I also took some great photos of the birds at the nearby pond. Some thoughts were written in my small black notebook, and I was considering posting them here, but right now I'm too tired.

Thu 2003-06-12 04:19 in diary No comments #link

Blame it on my youth

NP: Brad Mehdau - Blame it on my youth

Saw Matrix Reloaded yesterday. Considering the crushing reviews I had seen beforehand, it wasn't bad. There was way too much fighting material, though. Also, a plot seemed to be, well, if not missing, then at least a bit staggering.

Yesterday, we also played some ping pong. I won one of the three rounds this time. I'm coming and you better watch out. =P

Sun 2003-06-08 14:33 in diary No comments #link

going on and on

I've been awfully lazy to blog lately. I started a photo journal about last weekend on Monday and didn't finish it before today.

Yesterday, we (me, my mother, Elina and Jennitys) saw the movie 'The pianist'. Oh, it was well worth it's Oscars. Mother had decided to take a two-day trip to Tampere, she bought us the movie tickets and afterwards, took us to a restaurant.

Lots of such things have happened, tonight I've mostly been installing things on my Linux box and working a bit for Aleksin Ravintolat, as always. Last week boro helped me set up the Linux box so that it routes internet traffic also to my main computer. Today, I got the Apache web server installed, as well. PHP is in the process of getting installed - for some reason, I couldn't get it work with dselect/apt-get.

Earlier, we played some ping pong with Elina. she won all the three rounds of the game we played. I guess I'm supposed to be bitter ;).

Fri 2003-06-06 23:27 in diary No comments #link